I’ve been quiet in this space.
It wasn’t planned; but as the days stretched out I didn’t feel any sort of pull to come back. Simarily, Instagram has felt like more of a hassle than an enjoyable place to share. I’ve needed to find moments to simply breathe in my day, but even those are hard to come by.
October is one of my favourite months. The days grow shorter, the cool crisp air is felt in both early morning and late evening, and we all start to settle into the holidays that bring us together. Everything begins to slow and routines are finally settled into. but I have been struggling to find my routine.
I was quite surprised to have my landlord remind me I’m coming up on a year in this apartment. And even more surprised that I’m finally feeling like I have a sense of permanence in it. The spare moments I can find in the evening have been used for cozying up nooks or corners, redecorating, and generally trying to spend more time away from my desk and computer and in my other living spaces.
This lack of routine, this rearranging of furniture and pictures, it’s all contributed to a creation of a small sense of chaos within me. The plans I hope to have in the following months are so open to change, that my sense of control has been ripped from my finger tips.
And though that isn’t a bad thing, it’s a new thing.
But, I am starting to settle into this lack of routine. I’m finding open spaces and choosing to stick previous routines of gym time, soft music while cooking, and organizing into the open spaces I find in a day. I’m writing more for myself than for others, and I’m placing the highest value on my spare time.
October has always been a season of calm for me, and I’m choosing to find a calm within the storm. I hope so far this month has been good to you, or at least you’re able to find the small “goods” within it.